The storied pro wrestling career of Madonna

[Loss]

Madonna was born on August 16, 1958 in Bay City, Michigan, a Detroit suburb. She is one of many famous pro wrestlers from the Detroit area, as the Steiner Brothers, Rob Van Dam and Kevin Nash are just a few of the other big names that grew up near the city. And much like the name of the local territory, you might say she always set her sights on the Big Time. It is even rumored that her 1990s obsession with bondage was inspired by the name of one of the biggest stars in the Detroit territory, Dick the Bruiser.

 

Madonna is one of the most famous pro wrestlers in history, and one of the biggest draws as well. Her reputation has always been that when working with a great producer, she can be carried to a really great performance, despite having marginal talent. She has also influenced countless modern talents, including Lady Gaga, Katy Perry and Rihanna, three of the biggest names in the business now. In addition, she has also been cited as a major influence by Hulk Hogan and Chris Jericho.

 

Like most wrestlers, Madonna dreamed of making it big in New York. She moved there in the late 1970s, but had trouble getting gigs initially. Eventually, in 1979, she was part of the Patrick Hernandez Revue, who had a minor hit, a ***1/4 song called "Born To Be Alive" where she had a background role. Many wrestlers since have taken similar paths to the top, working as security guards during angles on Monday Night RAW before achieving solo stardom years later.

 

She was able to eventually get signed by Warner Brothers, one of the top promotions in the country, and debuted in 1983. While her performances were generally well received, she was criticized by sheet writers for working a dated, disco style and in a famous quote, it was said that she sounded "like Minnie Mouse on helium". Over the years, her reputation would improve as she became more comfortable working in front of large crowds. Much like WCW's concerns about the audience at Center Stage years later, promoters were worried that she sounded "too black" and began hyping her videos heavily, presumably to make sure audiences knew she was white. In one of her first videos, "Borderline", she spray painted a sidewalk, a move that would later be copied and made more famous by the NWO.

 

She largely existed in the shadow of the more established Cyndi Lauper in her earlier years. Lauper, who worked for the WWF, was considered the better worker with more long-term drawing power while Madonna was considered a flash in the pan. Their relationship and the comparisons made were very similar to that of Ric Flair and Hulk Hogan. And like the Flair-led Jim Crockett Promotions, Lauper's drawing power waned over the years and she was no longer competition by the late 80s. By late 1984, after her hit songs "Like a Virgin" (which would later influence Molly Holly) and "Material Girl", she had surpassed Lauper as the top star in the industry. She even wore a belt that said "Boy Toy", a nickname later stolen by Shawn Michaels.

 

Much of Madonna's success during this time can be credited to working with booker Nile Rodgers, who previously had success in the late 1970s disco era as part of the Chic stable. But Madonna would become an even bigger star at the first MTV Video Music Awards, which took place four months before the first Wrestlemania, when she shot an angle where she rolled around on stage in a wedding dress. While Sunshine and Precious had done physical angles involving rolling around in World Class before, this was on a far bigger stage and was seen by many more people. In 1985, nude photos were released of her in Playboy and Penthouse, which would also later happen to fellow wrestlers Sable and Chyna. She married actor Sean Penn and like Hulk Hogan, made several attempts at crossing over into film that never quite worked, despite her best efforts.

 

Fearful that she was becoming stale, Madonna changed her look and gimmick, as she would do many throughout her career. She cut her hair and bleached it a white-ish blonde, greatly resembling Marilyn Monroe and also following in the footsteps of noteworthy brunette Ric Flair. She was soon in demand by international promoters because of her drawing power overseas, and memorably hosted Saturday Night Live shortly after changing her gimmick, much like many of the WWF's top stars would host SNL in 2000. In 1988, she divorced Sean Penn and began dating Warren Beatty the following year after being paired with him in the Dick Tracy program. She was again attempting a crossover into film that wasn't quite successful, despite her HHH-like attempts to gain favor with those already established in the business. But she continued to have great success in pro wrestling, with her catchphrase "Strike a pose" and her voguing manuevers catching on in a big way with the gay audience, with whom she was always a huge draw.

 

She also had the video "Like a Prayer", a half-religious, half-miscegenation angle designed to draw big heat, which was successful, but ended up resulting in tons of complaints to Pepsi, much like Black Saturday resulted in many complaints to TBS years earlier. In the end, Pepsi opted not to air the commercial she had filmed for them, but she was allowed to keep the $5 million they paid her for the ad. Legend has it that Pepsi told her, "You'll choke on that $5 million." This inspired Ted DiBiase's post-match antics in the WWF around the same time.

 

It was around this time that she began her own personal Attitude era of sorts, releasing the controversial video "Justify My Love", which included bondage and lesbian sex and was considered too hot for MTV. Later, her video "Erotica" would only be played after 11:00 PM EST. Also, she released the controversial book "SEX", a book which told tales of wild fantasies and included pictures that were questionable in taste, much like Mick Foley's "Have A Nice Day". The controversial spiral binding of "SEX" also influenced Lou Thesz's "Hooker". The Attitude era comparisons don't stop there. In some ways, she went too far during this time period, to a point where it began adversely affecting her drawing power. Like WWE in the last few years, she toned down her image greatly and began seeking a starring role in Evita, much like WWE has sought high-dollar sponsors and switched to a PG rating in the post-Benoit era.

 

By the end of the decade, age was becoming an issue, and newer stars like Britney Spears and Christina Aguilera were catching on. Spears was a natural, even doing a tribute to Jake Roberts at the 2001 MTV Video Music Awards, where she performed while holding a snake. For her, wrestling would eventually become a family business, with then-husband Kevin Federline even scoring a pinfall over John Cena on Monday Night RAW! Aguilera's appeal was more limited, but she was considered a promising talent in her own right. She was heavily praised by Dragon Gate fans for her spotfest vocals and smooth body, although like many Dragon Gate performances, sometimes her histrionics may have gone a little long.

 

Madonna was aware of her standing, and even contemplated doing a worked retirement angle like Hulk Hogan had in WCW. But instead, unlike the WCW headliners, she decided to work with the younger stars, which provided fresh scenarios for her and saved her career. In a famous angle in August of 2003, she kissed Britney Spears at the MTV Video Music Awards, which was later pushed as the biggest moment of the show. In doing so, she siphoned the heat of Spears, who at the time was similar to AJW stars in that she didn't publicly play up any associations to booze or men. Spears played a good girl and the angle began a fast descent down the cards for her while Madonna came out of the angle a revitalized main event star. Hulk Hogan's post-match angle with the Ultimate Warrior at Wrestlemania VI has nothing on this, as Madonna saw immediate benefit, where it took a year for the WWF to rebuild around Hogan. As successful as this was, they missed an opportunity by keeping her appearance a surprise instead of promoting it weeks in advance. After working an angle with Alex "A-Rod" Rodriguez in the press, she filed for divorce from new hubby Guy Ritchie. She had failed to learn the lessons of many before her in wrestling, as like Kevin Sullivan, she booked her own divorce. She promptly dropped her fake British gimmick that she had been working to mixed results over the past few years and moved back to New York, bringing her career full circle.

 

Madonna had some amazing rivalries over the years. There was Janet Jackson, who came from a famous wrestling family with major problems, including an abusive father who aggressively pushed his children to pursue a future in the business, similar to the Von Erichs. There was Mariah Carey, whose career took a major dive when she divorced promoter Tommy Mottola, who helped her become a star. There was Whitney Houston, at one time a popular highspot vocalist whose career was sidelined by drugs and bad relationships, much like that of Sean Waltman. She also had a "Wrestlemania moment", if you will, at the 1995 MTV Video Music Awards, when Courtney Love threw a shoe at her and Madonna accused her of being a drug addict. This appeared to be the start of a program, but like The Rock, Love would soon leave the wrestling business to pursue a film career. In the end, Madonna was the biggest star in the business because she understood how the business worked. She understood the need to keep her gimmick fresh and to change her look to reflect the times. As we all know, the wrestling business changes come quicker than a ray of light, and those who can't adapt are quickly left behind.

[KrisZ]

This is phenomenal

[jdw]

Awesome.

 

John

[Ditch]

The only problem here is that I don't think anyone else, with the possible exception of Bix, would be brave enough to try and follow lines like "although like many Dragon Gate performances, sometimes her histrionics may have gone a little long."

[El-P]

This is the greatest article in the history of our sport.

[tomk]

It is worth taking a couple extra moments to talk about Patrick Hernandez, who truly is a great forgotten worker. In 78/79 Hernandez was working a "video dance pop star" wrestling gimmick at a point where "video dance pop star" was becoming a real workrate centric gimmick. Hernandez couldn't perform to this new athletic standard. But he still had great ring psychology and realized that he could use a foreign object to compensate for the lack of athleticism. While he may not have directly inspired Onita, Mr Pogo does credit Hernandez' cane use as an inspiration.

 

 

Born

Born to be alive

 

Despite his short peak as a wrestler, Hernandez' influence cannot be underestimated.

[Strummer]

Brilliant!

[sek69]

The Jacksons-Von Erichs comparison scarily accurate.

[Boondocks Kernoodle]

This would probably be the best place to note that I've always believed that HHH's entrance at Mania 22 was his way of campaigning for the title role in the Conan the Barbarian remake, much in the way Madonna "auditioned" for Evita with the "Take a Bow" video. Tell me I'm not nuts for thinking this.

[El-P]

I think I already mentionned how Wolrd War II was really well booked and how it made the General de Gaulles the biggest babyface in France for decades, people are still stealing from his promos today. Even his short-lived heel turn during May 68 was a huge success and people throwing thrash and fighting in the streets really foreshadowed the nWo angle, at least during its first few months. Hogan stole a lot from him, and him jobbing to Jacques Rougeau in Montreal in 97 was really a tribute to the famous "Vive le Québec libre !" promo by De Gaulle to get a pop from this particular audience.

[Marty]

Awesome stuff!

 

When you got into the Madonna-Spears lesbian kiss, I expected a comparison to the Trish Stratus-Pamela Anderson lesbian kiss that took place at the 2006 Canada Walk Of Fame ceremonies. But your comparison and FAR deeper theories to Hogan-Warrior at Mania VI well surpassed that. Well done!

[Loss]

13 years later, Madonna does a tribute to Halftime Heat. And it's every bit as good.

[NintendoLogic]

It's worth pointing out that Kissing Suzy Kolber referred to Madonna in the halftime show as "Blonde Chyna."

[Timbo Slice]

Phenomenal. Absolutely phenomenal.

[BackToBionic]

I'm not ashamed to admit (maybe I should be) that I have a Madonna tattoo so this thread is surreal and hilarious.