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[1990-08-25-USWA-Memphis TV] Jeff Gaylord and Downtown Bruno


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  • 2 months later...

Think we messed up on the date on this one. Anyway, Jeff Gaylord overreacts to Downtown Bruno being an idiot, then runs around the ring like an idiot. The worst wrestler of all time. Brian Lee, Jeff Gaylord, Don Harris, Downtown Bruno ... This is a pretty spectacular collection of lame.

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  • 2 weeks later...

Brian Lee and Don "The Stomper" Harris are THE DREAM TEAM. People have been DREAMING of seeing these two team up! They can't be beaten! Bruno runs down Jeff Gaylord. Gaylord looks a lot like Charlie Sheen as Topper Harley in the second Hot Shots! movie and makes some ridiculous, mystifying facial expressions in reaction to this. Gaylord throws Bruno across the announce desk after intoning, "I LOST THE MATCHES??" Well, gosh, Jeff, did Bruno say anything that wasn't true? He wasn't wrestling for you. Gaylord stomps around the ring and his squash is barely underway when he gets laid out by Lee and Harris. Gaylord is hit repeatedly in the head with a chair. With the known effects of concussions I should be condemning such a move in a throwaway angle like this, but Gaylord should be utterly immune to the effects so I give this a pass. Bruno gets in a punt to the groin for good measure.

 

I admit, this should have been a momentous, pivotal turn in the history of Memphis wrestling if not all of wrestling, but the messed-up date on the yearbook totally took me out of it. You have to step up your game when accurately preserving history like this.

 

Jeff Jarrett's mystery partner apparently gets told to take a hike, and Gaylord will be his partner Monday night. Jeff Gaylord cuts a screaming promo that comes from someone with either a psychotic mind or severe gastrointestinal distress.

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  • 2 weeks later...
  • 3 weeks later...

Downtown Bruno talks about the recent lack of success Jeff Gaylord has had in the ring. This is costing Bruno money. Gaylord snaps and flings Bruno over Dave Brown’s desk. Gaylord has a match but Bruno sends the tag champs Lee and Harris after Gaylord. That was a quick match. Bruno puts the boots to Gaylord after he was laid out by Lee and Harris.

 

Marlin lets us know that Jeff Jarrett will be Jeff Gaylord’s partner. Gaylord gives a crazy promo.

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  • 4 months later...

"Mama says it beez that way sometimes" is STILL a catchphrase amongst Jarrett Promotion wrestling fans of that era. Bruno wasnt that bad, really. When he first rolled in, around 1986, he was quite...entertaining, for lack of a better word rambling at the speed of sound about his days on Fort Duquane Boulevard, beating up trannys. Im not shitting you either.

 

Jeff Gaylord, I think, just missed his calling in life. He was born to be a gym/health class teacher/high school football coach. Made to do steroids, belittle fat kids and kids he thought were "Marys", make AIDS jokes, have a drinking problem and slapping around a few wives.

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  • 1 year later...

For someone who actually grew up in Memphis, Bruno doesn't do a bad Pittsburgh accent; take it from a Pittsburgher. Maybe he had family in the area. Fort Duquesne Boulevard isn't exactly the red-light district Bruno claims it is, but it's an exotic-sounding name that evokes mystery and danger, and besides, who in Memphis is going to know the difference?

 

As for what we saw here, Jeff Gaylord is the walking stereotype of the professional wrestler. He is what all the detractors of this business claim that every professional wrestler is: a muscleheaded screaming goon who walks around with a bloody face (made that way by blood capsules, naturally) and chronic bug eyes, with intelligence that would fit on the head of a Q-tip. Can you imagine the number of people who might have happened upon that one segment and were turned off of wrestling forever, satisfied that everything they might have heard about it was true?

 

Seriously, this isn't bad for a bunch of midcarders, and I'm probably judging Gaylord a bit too harshly. But his performance seemed so in line with everything that was laughed at about wrestling at the time (and still is now, quite frankly) that it stood out to me.

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  • 1 year later...
  • 8 months later...

Downtown Bruno is out with his ‘Dream Team, the USWA tag team champions, ‘Primetime’ Brian Lee and Don ‘The Stomper’ Harris. Dave Brown says that Jeff Jarrett will have a mystery partner to take on the champions, but Bruno thinks this partner is non-existent, that no-one actually wants to be his partner and that is why he hasn’t named them. He says that his team have only been back in the USWA for a little over two weeks and they’re already the tag team champions of the world. This team can’t be beaten, they’re the ‘Dream Team’! Dave then says it was only three weeks ago he was talking about the ‘Wild Things’ the same way and saying that they were the greatest team he ever saw. Bruno replies that even geniuses like him make a mistake once in a while! Gaylord, looking camp as they come with his hands on his hips, has a look of shock and disgruntlement on his face whilst he is saying this. He says that Scott Braddock was a loser so he fired him, but kept Jeff Gaylord along as he thinks he won’t be such a disappointment. He’s used to only managing winners and champions though, so in that respect, Gaylord is a bit of a disappointment at the moment! If he can follow his guidance and years of experience, then maybe he can be somebody, but he’s losing too many matches and it’s costing him money! Gaylord has some funny old facials, but I think he’s trying to convey anger and that he’s fuming on hearing this from Bruno. He’s heard enough though, lifts Bruno up off his feet and throws him to the floor, blaming him for him losing all those matches. He then says something unintelligible to Harris and Lee before shoving them,

 

Gaylord gets in the ring for his match with Don Kelly, but he’s jumping around in there like some sort of maniac. The match doesn’t go long before Gaylord is jumped by Lee and Harris. ‘Primetime’ clocks him in the head with a chair twice busting him open and Bruno is even getting involved in the beat down. The Dream Team hold Gaylord and Bruno repeatedly slaps him before kicking him in the groin between his legs! Lee with more chair shots to the back and Gaylord is left bloodied in the ring with Bruno saying that you don’t mess with the Dream Team, and you don’t mess with the living legend Downtown Bruno (although Bruno seems a little tired from his exertions in the attack!)

 

Back from a commercial break and Eddie Marlin and a bloodied and bandaged Gaylord are with Dave. Marlin has made a call of Jeff Jarrett on Gaylord’s behalf, explained what just happened here and that he wants to be his partner for the tag match. Jeff agreed and he’ll now be teaming with Jeff Gaylord to face Downtown Bruno’s ‘Dream Team’. A raging and eyes bulging Gaylord cuts a laughable promo on them and says how they didn’t finish what they started and the three of them will be the ones who are finished when he gets hold of them. He throws down a chair and then storms off in anger.

 

This was good for all the wrong reasons. Gaylord really should have attended some acting classes whilst going to wrestling school (if he ever went that is!).

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  • GSR changed the title to [1990-08-25-USWA-Memphis TV] Jeff Gaylord and Downtown Bruno

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