After finishing up a massive work project, I am finally able to get rolling...
SEPTEMBER 9, 1995 TV
The show opens with a brand-new video showcasing the new-look roster in the promotion. Featured talents include the Heavenly Bodies, Brian Lee, Hunter Hearst Helmsley, the Godwinns, Unabom, Buddy Landell and Dutch Mantel before closing with a shot of Brad Armstrong holding up the SMW Heavyweight Title.
We then cut to the new SMW Studio. The fans are right on top of the action. The ring is well-illuminated by a seemingly state-of-the-art lighting system. Facing the hard camera is a set of steps leading up to a small stage where a black curtain apparently separates the arena from the locker room.
Bob Caudle and Dutch Mantel are together at the broadcast position, standing in front of a backdrop with a giant version of the SMW logo emblazoned upon it.
Caudle: Hello everyone, and welcome to a new era here in Smoky Mountain Wrestling! I'm Bob Caudle joined this week by Dirty Dutch Mantel, and Dutch, how about this great new studio we have, right here in downtown Knoxville!
Dutch: Bob Caudle, this is the type of quality environment that fits the amazing analysis I bring every single week. My sources tell me this studio was purchased by the new investor here in Smoky Mountain Wrestling, and all I can say is, it's about time!
Caudle: You're absolutely right, Dutch, there is a new investor here in Smoky Mountain Wrestling but, as far as I know, NOBODY knows who it is! Maybe we'll have some news on that soon. But for now... let's, oh, hang on now...
The studio audience erupts in boos as Jim Cornette walks into the shot flanked by the Heavenly Bodies.
Caudle: Jim Cornette, what exactly are you doing out here?
Cornette: Bob Caudle, maybe you can explain something to me! You see I was told that Smoky Mountain Wrestling was going to enter a new era! I was told that there would be a fresh start! New faces! And yet I walk into the building and who do I see? The same stinkin' long-haired bandana-draped idots I've been fighting for years, Ricky Morton and Robert Gibson, the Rock & Roll Express! [the crowd erupts into huge cheers at mention of them] See, Bob, I'm sick and tired of going against these two! How many times do my teams have to prove that they're better? Whether it's been Loverboy Dennis and Beautiful Bobby, or Beautiful Bobby and Sweet Stan, or Sweet Stan and Doctor Tom, or my current team, the GREATEST duo ever to lace up a pair of boots here in Smoky Mountain Wrestling, the greatest thing to come through Knoxville since the Florida Gators football team... Dr. Tom Prichard and Jimmy Del Ray, the Heavenly Bodies! Every single one of those teams has done the same thing, night... after night... and that's leave the Rock & Roll Express looking up at the lights! But these two keep showing up like cockroaches, don't they?! Well, boys, call us the exterminators, cause it's time to get rid of you... once and for all! And--
Suddenly Ricky Morton and Robert Gibson walk into the shot. Morton, Gibson, Prichard and Del Ray all are pointing at and jawing at one another.
Cornette: Oh, look at what we have here! What a surprise to see you two idiots out here trying to steal our spotlight. Well if you think I'm gonna let--
Cornette's tirade ends ABRUPTLY when Ricky Morton drills him with a huge roundhouse right to the face! As Cornette goes sprawling, the two teams start a WILD brawl. Caudle and Dutch bail out and a huge slugfest ensues. Gibson and Prichard are duking it out right at the broadcast position, while Morton and Del Ray battle their way towards the ring. After only a couple of minutes, Smoky Mountain referees come out to try and separate the combatants but the brawl rages on! Commissioner Bob Armstrong is out as well along with security staff in plain white polo shirts. As the action finally seems to calm down, a camera catches Cornette struggling to his feet. His glasses are broken and he has a HUGE gash under his right eye, blood pouring down his cheek!
The show goes to a very abrupt commercial break.
Brian Lee vs. Sgt. Craig Pittman
Back from the break and Pittman is already in the ring as Lee makes his entrance. Despite his recent history, Lee wrestles this match right within the rules. Pittman takes shortcuts and tries to isolate and attack Lee's left arm, but "Primetime" is able to rally back with a couple of clotheslines, followed by two body-rattling slams and finishes him off with the Cancellation.
WIN: Brian Lee by pin @7:17
After the match, Lee heads to the broadcast position for an interview with Bob Caudle.
Caudle: An impressive win there by a former SMW Heavyweignt and Tag Champion, Brian Lee!
Lee: Thanks Bob, but I've got something to say. You know, a lot of people here in this studio and watching at home may not think too much of me right now. I've been doing some things I'm not proud of... working with Sunny, with Chris Candido... and what happened? They had a chance to go somewhere else, and they left me high and dry! I've learned my lesson. I realize I made a mistake. And I want to promise all you people, right here and now, that the REAL "Primetime" Brian Lee... is BACK!
Cheers from the crowd in the studio as Lee walks off.
Caudle: Looks like the old Brian Lee has returned, Dutch!
Mantel: Oh, great...
Caudle: Well, fans, you saw what happened at the start of the program... a wild brawl between the Rock & Roll Express and the Heavenly Bodies that left Jim Cornette bloody! Let's get an update now from our Commissioner, Bob Armstrong.
Armstrong walks into the shot.
Bullet Bob: Thank you, Bob. Everyone knows the way I operate as the Commissioner. The type of actions we saw earlier tonight, I will not tolerate. I've fined Ricky Morton, Robert Gibson, Tom Prichard and Jimmy Del Ray $500 apiece, and ejected them from the building. As for Jim Cornette, he's currently in the back getting medical attention from our training staff.
Caudle: Now, Commissioner, what about this new investor we're hearing so much about?
Armstrong: You know, that's a good question. Frankly all I know for now is that this individual wants to stay anonymous. But, I received a note just before we went on the air today... that this investor will be here next week on the program!
Caudle: Big news from our Commissioner, but for now let's go back to the ring for more action.
Godwinns vs. Buddy Landel & Duane Gill
Tag team action and the Nature Boy seems less than pleased about who is his partner. Landel starts out in the ring going against Phineas, and gains the upper hand but the tide turns quickly once he makes the exchange to Gill. From there the hog farmers take over, battering Gill from pillar to post with brawling and power moves. Landel throws up his hands in disgust and leaves the ring apron. About 30 seconds later, the Godwinns hit their double Slop Drop to finish the overmatched Gill.
WIN: Godwinns by pin @4:19
Caudle: A nice win by the Godwinns, but boy did Buddy Landel leave his partner out to dry!
Dutch: I think you're giving Gill too much credit by calling him a partner for a man like my good friend Buddy Landel. The Nature Boy deserved better, that might as well have been a handicap match!
Caudle: Well, fans, as you know Smoky Mountain Wrestling added several exciting new talents to its roster last month. Right now, let's take a look at one of these individuals... Hunter Hearst Helmsley.
The picture fades into a shot of Helmsley, sitting in what appears to be a library or study in front of a fireplace. Rich mahogany and lush furniture are seen in the shot. Helmsley, sitting with one leg crossed, is sipping a cup of tea with his pinkie extended.
Helmsley: Ahhh... So it appears that my professional future is leading me to Smoky... Mountain... Wrestling. And quite frankly, I could not be more excited about it. You know, just the other day... at my country club... we were discussing my debut, and one of my squash partners said, "Hunter? How can you be excited about going to such a ghastly place?" Now, it might be true that the people in Smoky Mountain Wrestling crowds lack a certain... culture. You might call them crass. Uncouth. Unwashed, even. But all that is about to change. Because I am coming to show you people what a TRUE gentleman is. You are going to witness what true etiquette means, and you will learn it from, well, the best qualified teacher to do so, the Gentleman from Greenwich, Hunter Hearst Helmsley. And if anyone in the Smoky Mountain locker room gets in my way, well... he best prepare... for an etiquette lesson.
Helmsley goes back to sipping his tea as we go to another commercial break.
Back from the break, and it's time for our thrilling main event, a special tag team match.
Jerry Lynn & Kendall Windham vs. Dirty White Boy & Bull Pain (w/ Ron Wright)
Caudle: An interesting match here as I don't think any of these two teams have ever been partners before!
Indeed they haven't, and both teams have some communication issues early on. Lynn and Windham get the upper hand early as Mr. Ron Wright shouts instructions from ringside. Lynn really is showing off some fantastic moves during an extended stretch of the match against DWB, and when he clears out of the ring to try and huddle up with Bull Pain, Lynn scales to the top rope and FLIES with a huge cross body to obliterate both men! The impact leaves Lynn down and hurting, as well, and Pain and DWB are able to drive him into the ringpost before rolling his carcass back into the ring. From there, the two bruisers take control of the match, torturing Lynn with punches, kicks, eye gouges, chokes and generally bending every rule in the book. But Lynn won't go down for the 3 count. Finally, after several minutes of isolation, Lynn is able to roll through behind Pain on a belly to back suplex attempt, and makes a stumbling lunging tag to Windham! The second generation star comes in like a house afire, dropping both DWB and Pain with lariats, followed by a running dropkick to Pain! DWB and Pain attempt a double team, and Lynn comes rushing to his partner's aid, but is quickly dumped to the floor after the beating he received earlier. Pain and DWB double team Windham, and DWB holds Kendall as Pain rushes off the ropes going for a clothesline... but Windham moves and DWB gets laid out! Windham throws Pain out between the ropes, then hooks a woozy DWB and delivers a bulldog for the 1-2-3!
WIN: Jerry Lynn & Kendall Windham by pin @ 13:26
The studio audience erupts in cheers at the win by Windham and Lynn, who quickly leave in celebration. Meanwhile, Bull Pain is on his feet on the floor... and he's yelling at Dirty White Boy.
Caudle: Bull Pain is upset!
Dutch: He should be because the Dirty White Boy just cost them a win!
Ron Wright says something and now Bull turns and confronts Mr. Wright, still in his wheelchair. That brings DWB sliding out to the floor, and the partners start to duke it out! Dirty White Boy quickly starts lighting up Bull Pain with punches, until Bull catches DWB with a low knee. White Boy drops to his knees after the low blow, and Bull Pain delivers a measured kick to the head before stalking out of the studio to loud boos.
Caudle: Well I've got a feeling we've seen the first and last time those two are a tag team! Fans, for--
There's a rustling sound, and some arguing off the microphone.
The camera cuts back to the broadcast position, where Jim Cornette is trying to wrestle the microphone away from Bob Caudle. Cornette grabs it. He has fresh stitches in his cheek and a huge bruise under his eye as well.
Cornette: Morton and Gibson! You think you two can put your hands on me?!? ENOUGH! It's time we settle things, once and for all! Next Saturday, September 16, we come to Cookeville, Tennessee. That night, I say we finish this! I can't talk to my Heavenly Bodies right now, but I don't NEED to. That night, I'm laying down the challenge! Dr. Tom and Jimmy Del Ray against the Rock & Roll Express for the Smoky Mountain Tag Titles... one last time! Because the losing team? They agree NEVER to team together in Smoky Mountain ever again! One way, or another, Rock and Roll WILL DIE next Saturday in Cookeville!
Cornette stalks off.
Dutch: What a huge challenge laid down by the Louisville Slugger! Will the Rock & Roll Express accept? I guess we'll find out next week!