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Magnum Milano

Member Since 31 Aug 2008
Offline Last Active Today, 01:10 PM
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Topics I've Started

Chris Hero vs Paul E. Smooth (IWA-MS 01/17/01)

Yesterday, 07:10 AM

There’s an even more barren crowd than usual at the IWA warehouse tonight.  One member of the audience takes exception to Smooth’s pink top questioning “Don’t you make enough money to buy a different motherf*cking shirt?” which leads to Paul E. calling him a fat motherf*cker and telling him to shut up.  For most fans that would be enough for them to keep quiet and sit back down, not this guy though who suggests to Smooth to step outside so he can whip his ass.  Paul E.’s response to that is how about he f*cks him in the ass instead, which gets plenty of laughter from the few dozen in attendance.  This guy won’t stop and he’s now on about how much money he earns compared to the $25 a night that Smooth makes from wrestling.  When he throws a five dollar bill at him saying that’s all he’s worth, both Hero and Smooth rush out the ring to grab it, adding fuel to the fire of all the talk you here about Ian Rotten’s pay offs!  He continues to get on Paul E.’s case, to the point Hero just takes a seat in the corner and leaves the pair of them to it.  After telling Smooth to “suck his dick right now”, he calls this goon’s bluff, hopping out the ring and walking to the dressing room whilst gesturing for him to follow him.  Surprisingly he does exactly that, until getting about a foot from the doorway and thinking better of it.  Despite being made to look a prize fool he won’t stop his heckling and Smooth gets a “shut the f*ck up!” chant going.  At last we’re underway and Hero drops Paul E. with a stiff lariat.  Bloody hell, he’s now turned his attention to Hero calling him “Superman”.  Can Ian not do us all a favour and kick him out?  Shoulder charge to the mid-section followed by a snap suplex for a two.  Hero telegraphs the backdrop attempt and Paul E. counters with a ‘Diamond Cutter’.  Whip to the corner is reversed, but Smooth has the tip up scouted, not falling for it, and when Hero lands he kicks him between the legs.  Bronco buster, making sure to rub his crotch in Hero’s face, which gets more derogatory remarks from our redneck irritant.  Top rope frankensteiner.  Springboard crossbody by Smooth, however Hero catches and then dumps him with a fallaway slam.  Full nelson sit out slam and Paul E. kicks out of the lateral press.  Hero heads upstairs and Smooth just grabs the official, pulls him over to the ropes and says “look at that kid there, he’s jerking off”.  With the ref distracted, Smooth’s new bodyguard, 411 (yes!), jumps into the ring and plants Hero with a chokeslam.  Paul E. makes the cover and thanks 411 for his help with a smacker.

 

Nothing to see here, unless you want to watch how not to behave at a wrestling event, how to be an obnoxious twat and how to ruin the enjoyment of everyone else.  This guys has his ’15 seconds’ at the beginning and then doesn’t stop with the comments all the way through; he’s an utter nightmare.  Of all the ECW characters to rip off in 2001 you choose 911?  One for the Hero completists only.


Justice Pain vs Yoshihiro Tajiri (CZW Crushing the Competition 02/10/01)

17 June 2018 - 05:21 AM

Justice’s CZW Heavyweight title isn’t on the line in this non-title affair, although he still runs to the ring, clearly in a hurry to get his hands on Tajiri.  Tajiri ducks a clothesline, spits the green mist in his face and then tosses him over the top rope to the outside.  He whips him into the steel mesh fence, a member of the audience and finally a row of chairs as these CZW matches are all starting to morph into one.  Pain picks Tajiri up, driving him backwards into the fence, but walks into a thrust kick.  Kick to the balls.  A ‘hot shot’ followed by a basement dropkick and this has been all Tajiri so far.  Justice lands on the apron after being backdropped over the top rope and grabs Tajiri by the hair pulling him to the mat.  He heads upstairs and hits a pretty shitty looking ‘blockbuster’ for a two.  Spinning neckbreaker but he overshoots on the Lionsault.  Even though he lands on his feet he gets caught by a superkick and then planted with a reverse DDT.  Pain blocks the German with a back kick low blow and a ‘not so’ superkick sends Tajiri tumbling through the ropes to the outside.  He backs up that crappy superkick with a crappy dive to the floor, coming up a tad short and landing hip first on the concrete.  John House describes Justice Pain as ‘the Ultraviolent All-Star’; I’ll have to remember that one!  They walk amongst the fans and Tajiri surprises Pain, bashing him over the head with a metal tray.  Handspring elbow is thwarted as Justice grabs Tajiri around the waist and lands a German suplex for a two.  Our ‘All-Star’ wasn’t close enough to Tajiri on that spot so it looked suspect, like most of his offense to be fair.  Tajiri blocks the hip toss and clocks Justice with a couple of stiff kicks to the head.  ‘Brain buster’ before hopping out to collect a table from ringside.  Pain slides off the table as it tips over and Tajiri does a good job making light of the situation.  He puts him back on it and climbs to the top for the double foot stomp, when out comes Wifebeater who attacks him from behind.  Justice and Wifebeater struggle with that table and are about to put Tajiri through it when Mikey Whipwreck makes the save.  Dropkick to Wifebeater and a huracanrana on Pain that sees him (not really) go through the table.  It looks like the match has just ended, no ringing of the bell, no official announcement etc.  Justice challenges the two of them to a tag match next week, before remembering that this is Tajiri’s last show so Mikey won’t anyone to partner up with.  At this point a video message from Zandig, who isn’t there, is projected onto the wall at the back of the arena and he’s got a surprise.  Mikey Whipwreck will have a partner on 2/17, and that partner is Balls Mahoney.

 

Boy does Justice Pain suck.  We’ve had a right old rag bag of finishes to the matches on this show, and this was our second non-finish out of the five watched.  Tajiri more and more feels like a guy phoning it in until he joins up with the WWF, not that he had much to work with here mind.  I thought it after Acid/Berk, but a lot of this CZW stuff blurs together with how similar that the matches are, thankfully you’ve something like the Briscoes/SATs which deviates from the norm.  Mikey and Balls got sizeable pops showing that at the moment there is a definite market for fans wanting to see the old ECW guard.


Trent Acid vs Nick Berk (CZW Crushing the Competition 02/10/01)

17 June 2018 - 05:20 AM

These two were former partners in the ‘Softcore Connection’ and Acid’s got Z-Barr with him, who Gargiulo says looks like he’s out trick or treating dressed as Zandig and that he has an apple with a razor in for him!  There’s an added stipulation here that Berk only has ten minutes to beat Trent and he sprints to the ring not wanting to waste a second of those ten minutes.  Both swing for the hills until a big right hand sends Trent over the top rope and to the outside.   Berk launches him into a row of chairs, but when he whips him into the mesh fence, Trent jumps up it and moonsaults off onto him.  He throws Berk into the ring but then spends too long arguing with the fans and Berk hits a sunset flip powerbomb to the concrete (check Trent crack his head on the corner of a chair).  Tope con hilo with Berk vaulting off a chair to help him clear the top rope.  They briefly return to the ring before Trent dumps Berk back out after catching him on the tip up.  Moonsault from the top turnbuckle to the floor, although it looked ridiculous the way Berk walked way more than he should to get into position and then just waited for Trent to jump.  Acid and Barr set up a bunch of chairs next to each other, however Berk floats over on the suplex and lands an inverted version onto them instead.  He snatches a chair from Z-Barr and we have some more waiting around.  Trent ducks the chair shot and responds with a roaring elbow sending it crashing into Berk’s own face.  Bloody hell, yet more positioning and setting up of chairs, this time in the ring.  Berk blocks the superplex and shoves Trent backwards, although rather than getting the big bump they’d wanted, the chairs part like the Red Sea.  Despite all the bumps that these two have taken, the CZW fans choose to boo and groan at that spot.  Frog splash for a two.  Trent escapes the ‘Berk Driver’ and drops his opponent onto the chairs.  He looks for a third moonsault of the night but Berk is back to his feet and gives him a push, sending Trent four rows deep to the outside.  They walk and brawl to the back of the arena where Berk drops Trent onto the wooden bleachers before grabbing a table.  Acid ducks the punch and a ‘Blue Thunder Driver’ off the bleachers and through the table.  Barr and Trent carry him back to the ring and while they do so, according to my timing that should be the ten minutes up.  Having had the best part of a minute or more to recover, Berk kicks out of the eventual cover.  More furniture arranging and Trent has to call for replacement chairs because all the ones from earlier are now broken!  The ‘Acid Bomb’ is reversed, ‘Berk Driver’ onto the chairs and at the count of two the bell rings, the time limit having expired.  They were only two and a half minutes late!  Berk wants another five minutes and surprisingly, despite Z-Barr’s protestations, Trent agrees.  All sorts of roll ups and cradles as both men get a host of near falls.  The ‘Guerrero/Malenko’ sequence, a cool little backslide drop by Trent, nothing getting more than a two.  German suplex by Berk who then heads upstairs but has his leg pulled out from under him by ‘Z-Barr’.  ‘Cat’s cradle’ off the top although Trent didn’t look to comfortable on that.  Northern Lights suplex as the near falls continue.  Berk picks Trent up for an atomic drop and the ref walks right into a flailing leg.  That was contrived as anything!  Barr with a sit-out pedigree, Trent then puts a chair over Berk’s face and comes off the middle with a tumbleweed leg drop for the win.

 

I think it’s safe to say that the ‘additional five minutes’ were better than the first ten (twelve and a half) as we got a fair bit of actual wrestling crammed into that (joke of a ref bump aside).  They overdid the use of chairs something rotten during this, and I hated all the furniture arranging, time wasting, and the blatant setting up of spots.  When we’ve just had the three way ladder stunt show, not sure these two doing the same kind of match is the way to go.  You quickly become numb to the stunts.  I also found it funny that after seeing matches have time shaved off them, here we had one go long and then they had to claim it was shorter than it actually was.


Ric Blade vs Super Crazy vs Nick Mondo (Ladder) (CZW Crushing the Competition 02/10/01)

17 June 2018 - 05:19 AM

A week after KO’ing himself in Jersey All Pro, Ric Blade is back and wrestling in a ladder match.  Mondo cuts a funny promo at his expense, talking about him nose diving into the mat when on a Shooting Star and claiming that he had to pay Shorty to stand in his corner and cheer for him.  John House seems to think that Crazy will wait until Blade comes out before getting in the ring because he doesn’t want to square off one on one with Nick Mondo.  No idea why he would’ve thought that and turns out to be completely untrue.  A Crazy Asai moonsault takes down both men, he grabs a waistlock on Blade and Mondo with a sunset flip on Crazy who at the same time launches Blade with a belly to back suplex.  Blade bails to the outside but gets levelled by a Mondo tope con hilo.  Quebrada to the floor by Crazy.  Not wanting to be left out as usual and still showing that he’s got zero idea when it comes to selling, Blade follows that with an Asai tumbleweed (as Gargiulo called it).  Handspring kick to the jaw of Mondo after a couple of his lousy looking kicks.  A real contrived spot as Blade throws Mondo a chair and he has to stand there holding it while Ric runs the ropes for another handspring.  This time though Crazy is on the apron, grabs Blade on the handspring and with him upside down, Mondo dropkicks the chair in Blade’s face.  Double jump springboard moonsault by Crazy and Mondo collects the ladder which Crazy then props up in the corner.  Surfboard and the momentum on release sends Mondo crashing head first into the ladder (that looked so hokey).  A Samoan drop, nip up, standing moonsault from Blade and Crazy kicks out of the cover at two.  Blade turns his attention to Mondo, but his attempted tornado DDT is countered with a sit-out spinebuster onto the ladder.  Mondo opens out the ladder, starts climbing it and is met up there by ‘Mr No Sell’ who’s ascended the other side.  That fast becoming staple of the three-way, the ‘superplex/powerbomb’ with Crazy powerbombing Blade while he superplexes Mondo off it.  Crazy covers both men though only gets a two as Blade kicks out (surprise, surprise) while Mondo gets a foot over the bottom rope.  As Crazy steps out to re-position a couple of chairs on the concrete, he’s caught by a Mondo baseball slide dropkick.  He continues what Crazy had begun, bridging the ladder between the chairs.  After laying Crazy across it, he hits a running Swanton over the top rope and back out onto him.  Amazingly for Blade he hits it perfectly and didn’t overshoot like I was half expecting.  Tilt-a-whirl powerslam by Mondo on Blade.  Teeter totter springboard leg drop to the ladder, with the ladder crashing into a chair which had been placed over Blade’s face.  Crazy breaks up the cover and then powerbombs Mondo hard to the canvas.  Consecutive moonsaults off all three turnbuckles and its Blade’s turn to break things up.  Corkscrew moonsault, but before he can get the three, Crazy with a leg drop to the back of the head.  Crazy and Blade agree to work together and a double backdrop sends Mondo flying out the ring and onto a ladder which has once more been bridged between a couple of chairs.  Blade drags him back inside, they both cover him and we have co-winners.  Huh?  Crazy’s got no real interest in hanging around any longer than necessary, preferring to have a chat with Doug Gentry (who’s filming this for RF) while he wanders to the dressing room.  We’re not quite done as Mondo then demands a barbed wire ladder match against Ric Blade for next week’s show.

 

I intend to not try and repeat myself when it comes to these three ways, but see my previous comments with this being the worst example yet.  The purpose of this being a ‘ladder match’ was solely so they could incorporate using it as there was nothing for them to retrieve.  I should get used to Ric Blade’s non-existent selling but it bothers me more each time I see him.  And what on earth was up with that garbage finish?  Just declaring co-winners?  Nonsense.


Riot vs Wendi Wheels (Hardcore) (WOW Unleashed 02/04/01)

17 June 2018 - 05:14 AM

Lee Marshall and Bobby Heenan are our commentary team for the PPV.  The ‘Heavy Metal Maniac’ Riot is introduced first in this hardcore, anything goes, pinfalls count anywhere match.  ‘The Brain’ seems rather enamoured with her, although Marshall guarantees that she’s frightened more men than Loretta Bobbitt!  Riot cuts a pretty basic promo saying how she’s unbeatable, unbreakable and unstoppable.  ‘America’s Favourite Garage Pin Up’ is pushing a shopping cart and doesn’t even make it to the ring as Riot goes out to meet her.  Wendi avoids the swinging right hand, dumps Riot into the cart and tips it over.  She grabs a mop, but gets clobbered with a serving tray before she gets the chance to use it.  Riot asks some ringside fans “what do you want me to do with her?” and then slams her head first into the announcer’s desk.  She goes for a piledriver on the floor, but Wendi counters with a backdrop.  Flying clothesline from the apron followed by a sunset flip back into the ring.  Back elbow smash by Riot, who then drags Wendi over to the corner and hits a ‘Riot Twister’, which is a corkscrew elbow off the top rope.  Marshall describes that as phenomenal and he’s not wrong, that looked incredible!  Wheels kicks out of the cover (that move should be her finisher), so Riot deposits her through the ropes and back to the outside.  Bad move as Wendi grabs that mop from earlier and swings it at Riot as she comes off the apron with a double axe handle.  Riot snatches a drink from a fan, emptying it over Wendi, before hosing her down as an excited Heenan starts talking about wet T-shirt contests, however Wendi wallops her with a metal sign to put a stop to any of those notions.  They return to the ring where Riot ducks a punch and takes Wheels down.  Combination oma plata/crossface!  It’s sloppily applied, but is another nice idea out of her.  Wendi reaches the ropes although has to be reminded that there are no rules in play so that doesn’t automatically lead to the break.  Instead she uses a conveniently placed pizza tray to bash Riot in the head with.   She sits her on the top turnbuckle but spends too long playing to the crowd and Riot uses her foot to shove her backwards to the mat.  Powerslam on to the pizza tray.  Riot dropkicks a garbage can that she’d put over Wendi’s head and finally a delayed powerbomb puts her down for the three.

 

I wanted to watch something from the WOW PPV and there was not a chance it was going to be the Bambi/Peggy Lee Leather main event which according to the YouTube uploads runs for thirty minutes, so it was down to either this or the ‘Hair’ match as they looked the two most interesting.  WOW has got production values on a par with WCW, and although there are clearly empty seats in the arena, there’s a sizeable crowd in attendance for this.  You know going in that this wasn’t going to be that good, although I came out of it not regretting watching it due to Riot.  I’ve no idea where she came from or what she did after that, but the girls got a shed load of potential based on this.  Someone really should steal that corkscrew elbow as well, or maybe it’s a case that so few people watched this PPV that hardly anyone has ever seen it?